One of the beliefs that are very counter-productive in resolving conflict is them vs. us.  That means that you think in the terms of win or lose, right or wrong, good or badand them vs. us.  If you have that notion, it is very unlikely that you are ever going to resolve conflict because it’s now them vs. us.  So, think about us and us.  Think about demonizing “them” less and about trying to work with “them,” whoever theyare.  When you do that, you are much more likely to resolve conflict and them vs. us will become less toxic.
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