Your state of mind has a huge impact on the way you conduct yourself. Your ongoing beliefs determine a tremendous amount of the way you look at reality and apply those perspectives.Even if your beliefs are completely unreasonable, unrealistic, and irrational, you are likely to continue to proceed with your habits reflective of those beliefs. Therefore, before you begin to change your conduct, it is very important to first take an examination of your beliefs in the first place to determine if they are sane, reasonable, and realistic.
Think about your life and how you are living it. For most of us, our lives are filled with some great ups, some painful downs, and a whole boatload of underwhelming vanilla in the middle. We frequently waste a lot of time either watching life go by, or stalling with great intentions to get going real soon.
Regardless of how happy and fulfilling your marriage or relationship is, inevitably you will encounter difficulties and disappointments along the way. Often times it is either because you have become emotionally malnourished, you both feel unloved and/or unimportant, your relationship needs a tune-up, or perhaps the magic has faded. Most marriage partners fail to do the ongoing maintenance of the relationship to keep it healthy.
To rebuild a relationship that has gotten lost over the years, you must have a clear, compelling picture of the relationship you want. Then you both must commit to become equipped with the skills and habits to creating and maintaining that renewed and nourishing relationship.
A relationship lives in words and action, much like a play. If your relationship has become its own version of a bad play, then to make a better play (relationship), you must write and practice good scripts.
One way that you can create good marriage scripts is by figuring out what you and your partner want out of the relationship. In essence, it is time to “rewrite the screenplay.”
Start by having the following dialogue with your partner:
If you need to be perfect and the thought of alphabetizing your cans of soup gets you all tingly and excited, then go ahead and obsess about order.
On the other hand, you might want to attach some Common Sense to your perfection obsession.
Happy Turkey Day!
Dr. Mitchell Perry Read more