Use an “I” message.
Random Acts of Kindness
Think about the way in which your spirit can soar when you do something wonderful for someone else, particularly someone you barely know. For example: it looks like someone in a public place is very unhappy; buy a flower and give it to them. If there is someone in front of you at the supermarket and they are fumbling for change, pay it for them. Go to the hospital and spend some time with a sick person who wants company. It is really remarkable how you feel so much better about life when you perform a random act of kindness. So pay it forward, show some love, show some care, and your spirit will benefit enormously.
Counter-Productive Patterns of Speech – Speaking in the Second Person
You are watering down your authenticity.
Generosity of Spirit
Generosity of spirit has to do with forgiveness, compassion, going the extra mile, the bigger picture, etc. You know that people are imperfect, as are you. So, people screw up, as do you. Therefore, what you have to do is demonstrate generosity of spirit that is the extra mile, forgiveness, caring, empathetic dimension of yourself. In order to do that means you go the extra mile, you reach out, say “Thank you.” You say “I’m sorry.” You forgive and you let it go and you move ahead. You let go of the stuff that’s irreconcilable so that you can get on with your life. Show that generosity of spirit and you will see results.
Character – Responsibility
Responsibility is all about owning whatever decisions you have made. When you are a fully functioning grown-up, you take responsibility for your behavior, your actions, your decisions and your initiatives. So, responsibility really is learning to be a fully functioning adult. If you say you are going to do something, do it! If you say you are going to follow through, follow through! If something is broken on your watch, take ownership for it! Follow through, show commitment, and avoid the blaming, the whining, and that somehow thinking that making excuses is going to get you results. Take more responsibility and others will as well.
Counter-Prouctive Patterns of Speech – Self-Discount
You are teaching people how to treat you.
Strength of Character
Character is everything. When you hire somebody you hire them based upon their background and skills and when you fire somebody, it almost always has to do with character. At the end of the day everything comes down to your character, your principles and your basic governing values. What is one of the ingredients of character? It is your integrity. It is what everybody wants out of a co-worker or people in their family; even if that somehow means that you are going to be unpopular by telling the truth. If you tell the truth and refuse to lie, you are generally going to get better results in the long term. So, I encourage you to commit to more integrity. Tell the truth and you will get a reputation accordingly.
Counter-Productive Patterns of Speech – Past Tense
It waters down your horsepower.
Discipline
Regardless of whether I am talking to a parent or a businessperson, people really want discipline out of their children, co-workers, and subordinates. What is discipline? Discipline is the willingness to stay committed to do something even if you are disinterested in doing it. Whether it is discipline at exercise or discipline in following through with your education. If you think about discipline, and you have some way to influence yourself or someone else, simply say, “Discipline is doing it anyway.” If you are going to exercise and you are disinterested, just do it anyway. If you are going to follow through, do it anyway. When you do it that way, you are going to learn discipline and you will get a lot more done.
Security vs. Dependency
Happiness is when you are in control of your life.